


the aftermath

by ifonlysomebodycouldhear



Category: iCarly
Genre: Angst, Hurt-Comfort
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-04-22
Updated: 2012-04-30
Packaged: 2013-06-04 02:52:54
Rating: T
Chapters: 2
Words: 615
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8049575/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2984988/ifonlysomebodycouldhear
Summary: "'don't eat that.' the monsters inside my mind yelled. 'he won't come back to you until you're skinny.'" The aftermath of Sam and Freddie's break up. Warning: May be triggering.





	1. long

**10:30 PM  
**

"It's only 10:30."

"Wanna break up at midnight?

"That works."

**10:35 PM**

"Sam, wait." He said, breaking the kiss.

"What is it, Benson?"

"Should we be doing this?"

I stared at him, dazed. "What?"

"Well, I mean, if we're breaking up, should we really be..."

"Shut up, Benson." I said, undoing my shirt. "We're just having some fun."

"Don't tell me to shut up!"

_Then there was silence._

"Okay...I'm sorry. What do you mean?"

"I mean that if we're over, we shouldn't keep pretending what's about to happen hasn't technically already happened. We're emotionally lying to ourselves."

"Well, you do realize there's one solution to this entire mess, right?"

"Not breaking up?"

Sam nodded. Freddie sighed.  
_More silence._

"I don't know, Sam."

"So you're saying you really don't want to be with me?"

"I...I don't know. I need to really think about it."

"Yes or no, Freddie, it isn't that hard."

_More silence._

"...No."

_Silence._

"Sam, I'm so sorry, it's just-"

"Go."

"What?"

"Leave!"

Freddie nodded, opened the elevator doors and got out.

Sam went down to the lobby, got out, and wandered the streets. She eventually winded up home, sat on her porch and cried until the sun came up.

* * *

Sorry I'm not very good at introductions. I hope you guys enjoy where this story goes.

xoxo


	2. for

I've never been the type of girl to be affected by useless things. Popularity statuses, failing a test, who's dating who, all those other high school problems just weren't for me. See, it always came across as thought I believed myself better than everyone, but that wasn't necessarily the case. I just viewed myself as different. I was so against the idea of being like a typical teenage girl that I pretended the typical teenage girl things I went through weren't really happening. I would never admit that I liked Freddie because all the other girls liked Freddie. I would never tell anybody how much I cried the day Freddie broke up with me, or how hurt I was, or how much I wanted to die, because in the grand scheme of things, why would anyone be so hurt over a little high school break up? I mean, jeez, there are so many worse things in the world I could go through. My sister could die, I could be raped, I could develop schizophrenia, I could even become a dentist. The point is, things like that were real problems. And so yes, I fell in love, I took a shot and I was dumped. Boo freakin hoo.

The problem with that is, the more you pretend something isn't happening, the less you realize it, and the less you are able to stop it. When Freddie and I broke up, I pretended I wasn't hurt. When Freddie fell back in love with Carly, I pretended I was okay with it. When I became insecure, I pretended to be confident. When the pain got so unbearable I couldn't take it, I pretended it was nothing. When the only way I could deal with it was ripping apart my own skin, I pretended it was a normal thing. When I became unable to eat anything because I wanted to be skinny and perfect enough for Freddie, I told myself it was just an average diet. It wasn't until I was hanging over a tear stained suicide letter that I realized something was wrong.

I am Sam Puckett, and this is the story of the aftermath.


End file.
